Bryan Fischer To Save America From Satan Statues With Special Jesus Constitution - Wonkette

The merry Establishment Clause tricksters of the Satanic Temple held a big unveiling of their 1-ton statue of Baphomet over the weekend. Because they’re still waiting on a permit to place it next to the Ten Commandments monument at Oklahoma’s Capitol building — a monument that may be coming down anyway — the unveiling was held at the Satanic Temple’s chapter in Detroit. Not surprisingly, American Family Association radio guy Bryan Fischer is plenty angry about it, and would like you all to know that if we followed the REAL Constitution of the United States, none of this would be allowed, because the Founders only meant the First Amendment to apply to Christians.

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This time out, Fischer doesn’t really add anything new, but he has some lovely substitutions for logic, like this:

The Constitution is like the Bible. It either means what its authors intended it to mean, or it can mean anything the fevered imaginations of activist judges can dream up.

Judges routinely undermine the plain meaning of the Constitution and use linguistic sleight of hand to conceal their subterfuge.

To Fischer, it’s obvious that when the Constitution speaks of “religion,” it only means Christianity, because it just does, shut up:

Strangely, though, he’s perfectly comfortable insisting that the Second Amendment gives people the right to own any weapons they want, with no regulation whatsoever, despite the fact that the only arms the Founders had were muzzle-loaded rifles and flintlocks. That’s different, obviously.

Bryan Fischer To Save America From Satan Statues With Special Jesus Constitution - Wonkette