“At the time I didn’t know what the word
romantic means, but I felt very strongly that I wanted to hear him
pronounce my name on his lips. Sometimes I would walk behind him at home
like a shadow and imagine him suddenly turning around and saying that
wonderful word.”
Once, when she asked her husband to make love
to her more than the twice a month permitted in the Takanot, he left
their home to call a counselor for advice and only came back two hours
later.
“He paused for a moment in the entrance to the
living room, didn’t even look at me, and threw into the space of the
room the sentence that would hound me for many years afterwards and
until today: ‘The rabbi said one shouldn’t add days except what the
rebbe [head of the sect] from Gur defined, which is twice a month, and
we already did this twice this month! Therefore, the rabbi said, this
month we should not do it again, and added and instructed, that if you
accept my pronouncement, that is great! And if not — that I should sleep
in the living room, and if that also doesn’t help and you continue to
insist, then the rabbi ruled that I should sleep in the [synagogue]!
Good night!’
“He finished like a father instructing his
children to go straight to bed because it is late. He went to the
bedroom and immediately fell asleep, and I spent the night in tears and
wailing terribly.”
Before suicide, woman penned book about her ordeals in ultra-Orthodox world | The Times of Israel
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